Bumps in the Road ... Already

I'm not typically pessimistic. In fact, I'm really quite the opposite. But I don't care much for exclusion; already a clique appears to be forming ... or am I just paranoid?

I want to do this triathlon. I have signed up for it and paid my hard-earned $115. I am commited to doing and completing this thing. More so now than ever. (I have money on the line!) And I'd like to have (all) of my friends with me or around me while doing it. "The more, the merrier," I say. But already, "the group" consensus is not to invite or to add more people than us four: Me, Berta, Jenn, and Diana.

Okay, I can understand wanting it to be a small group of supportive folks, but I'm not as pleased with that because my past experiences with all women is that the smaller and closer knit you become, the more back-biting, stabbing, and gossiping occurs. My solution? Add enough people to the mix, and polite etiquette keeps it from getting ugly.

I kinda' think that people are like salads, throw it all together, mix it up, and you get unusual and interesting combinations. Not always pleasant, but at least you can pick and choose what you want out of it. Say you need to vent? Blow some steam to some other member and be done with it. No sides to take, because out of 10 people, it's not worth it. Out of 3 people, it becomes dangerous.

I'm really concerned because I'm very serious about my training and my triathlon goals. So much so, that I'm willing to go it alone at times just because I don't feel like being with others and/or because of schedule conflits. Thing is, I've already figured out that I don't need anyone else to get me through this. I like the company so far, but if need be, I'd be good to go from here on out alone. In some way, I almost anticipate as much will happen. (So, am I seeing the inevitable or causing the end? Therein lies the rub!)

Well, we'll see. I have high hopes, though. This is a good group of ladies, even though it's small.